First Steps down the Long Road

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

She had watched in silence, recognizing the boy from the Wheel. It was apparent that he'd recognized her as well, but there was nothing to be done about that.

When the tent's flaps closed them off once more, her body lost the tension that had instinctively built up, and her head bowed, eyes closing. A hand reached up to pinch at the bridge of her nose.

"I apologize," she started.

A deep breath, and she looked back up to him, offering a tentative smile. For a scant few moments before being interrupted, she had felt young again.

"About that walk... ?"

[Zem Vymes]

"Ain't nothing to apologize for. I'm not apologizing."

He reached a hand to her own, removing it from the bridge of her nose, and bringing it down between them where his fingers laced between her own.

"The offer's still good. Let's go get soaked."

A wink, and Zem exited the tent with his companion in tow, a brisk pace as they went down the muddy street to minimize their exposure to the deluge.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

Pulled along behind him, the Lupine couldn't help the unbidden smile that sprang to her lips, and after only a moment she matched her pace to his.

They were young again, as if the countless years that had separated them hadn't happened. As if they had always been together. Even with the rain coming down, she could not help the sense of happiness that finally passed through her. She was here, her children were here, Zem was here...

As they continued on, s'Il gave his hand a squeeze; a silent and heartfelt thank you for all that he had done.

[Zem Vymes]

"Well, you've met one of many of our Padawans." Zem spoke with a slight chuckle.

"We've got a few dozen students. Some are picking up their studies with a lot of talent. Feels good to breathe a spark of life back into the Jedi. And at the same time, this place is fast putting down roots. Feels less like the days when we were running away. There's something real taking hold here, Lok. Something good."

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

They ducked under an awning, taking a moment's rest before venturing out once more into the downpour.

"I am happy for you all," was all she could think of to say.

She looked out at the rain-soaked settlement; or at least, what she could see of it. She knew he was waiting for more, and she knew as well that he deserved more. He deserved so much more. Her children deserved so much more. Yet, what could she say, that hadn't already been said? She had her orders, and that was that. The Lupine looked forlornly at her surroundings, unsure of what words she could possibly say.

Finally, she let out a long sigh.

"It is wonderful to see."

[Zem Vymes]

Damn her stubbornness. Zem's smile was polite enough, but he didn't leave his frustration too far beneath the surface. What was it going to take to turn the tide?

"There's still plenty more to see."

Pushing on, he took her hand once more, braving the deluge to head to the infirmary. By the time they reached the awning, they were nearly at saturation point. Taking a moment to knock the water off their robes, the Jedi and the once-Jedi spent another moment together at the door.

"You ready?"

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

It hit her like a durracrete wall, the nervousness. The unsure feelings. Her son was inside, and for the first time in her life she was almost scared to enter. Perhaps it was that she felt unworthy? Perhaps she felt undeserving? s'Il couldn't pick out exactly what she felt, only that she felt it.

His words seemed to stir the pot even more, and she lifted her free hand to gently run along the doorframe, fingers sliding across to run along the door itself.

She could feel him in there, his small life force like a shining beacon to her senses, and it cause her to step back, bringing her arm away from the door to cover her chest as her eyes closed. Her other hand, still in Zem's grasp, pulled away and up to grip his shoulder.

"I'm scared," she whispered.

She had run away, leaving her children in the care of the Jedi, knowing that they'd be safest on Ossus. She had run away from the two that had depended upon her the most, that had needed her the most...

Her features screwed into a pained expression as she kept her eye on the door.

"I want to see them, but I'm so scared... "

[Zem Vymes]

Zem nodded at that. He knew that feeling. That unease in making taking the hard road back. The doubt. It could gnaw a hole in you. Change you. Though it frustrated him seeing her as she was, he was one of the few people here who understood.

"There's only one way to deal with fear. You might think you can step away, fall back, sidestep it. Every time you come back, it'll be there. That fear won't budge an inch unless you budge it. You hit it head on, Lok. You don't do that, and you'll keep running away, until you find that you can't run very far. Until you're in a prison."

The older Jedi removed her hand from his shoulder, and placed her hand over the door switch.

"You've got to figure that out on your own."

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

It felt like an eternity that she stood there, her hand over the door switch where Zem had placed it. And yet, despite the feeling of eons passing, time felt as though it had slowed to a bare crawl. Her eyes opened, her gaze settling on her outstretched hand, the fingers only a movement away from depressing the button fully.

She knew that he was right. It was something that she herself had known as well, and despite the fear that she had felt since landing on Ossus, the Lupine knew that to turn and run would fully destroy the remains of a family that was still reeling from such betrayal and loss.

Pulling in a long breath, she let it out slowly.

And without a word she pressed the button, watching the door slide open.

[Zem Vymes]

The lights were dim inside the infirmary. In the main area, a few beds sat empty. Fortunately there was no need for them at present. With sparring between Padawans accelerating on a daily basis, that often wasn't the case. More than a few broken bones and concussions got treated here, even without the rest of the camp's general population. Master Laran was effectively in charge of the operation, but hardly on call. Fortunately she was able to get a full night's sleep for the vast majority of the time. The only occupants of the infirmary other than Markos were the medical droids. One, a Two-OneBee unit designed for more surgical care, stood rigid in the corner, powered off. The other, a nurse droid with a design more conducive to proper bedside manner, rolled in from the adjacent nursery room. It's porcelain-white face housed two blue eyes, and it clasped its hands in front of its chassis.

"Master Vymes." a soothing feminine voice greeted the familiar Jedi as the droid's head dipped deferentially according to it's protocol programming. "Markos is sleeping quite soundly."

The droid's visual receptors focused on s'Ilancy, and the nurse stood a bit more upright.

"A new visitor? I must insist on absolute silence in the nursery, lest you wake the baby."

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

For the briefest of moments she looked at the dormant 2-1B and marveling at how even after all these years their appearance unnerved her. They just looked... wrong.

Of course, her attentions were immediately taken over by the other droid, and the soft voice that it spoke with. The sound of her son's name being spoken overrode any other understanding of what the droid had further spoken, and the Lupine moved forward, away from Zem to sidestep past the droid and stride swiftly into the nursery area. It was a modest area, and s'Il pulled in a deep breath as she approached the small crib that stood along the far wall. Markos' scent was strong, and as she slowed, her hands went out to rest upon the crib's side. Looking down at the boy as he slept, s'Il exhaled.

She was enraptured by the sight of her own child, staring down at him. His little chest moving with the rhythm of his breathing.

His hair had grown, a shock of blond that had gotten fuller. And despite the fact that he resembled his father heavily, the Lupine couldn't help the smile that pulled at her lips.

She reached down then, one hand going to the side of his face, a thumb moving to wipe an errant wisp of hair from closed eyes.

[Zem Vymes]

Zem hung back next to the protocol droid, wordlessly making a gesture that it would be alright. This was Lok's scene. This was her moment. He wasn't going to be anything here other than background scenery. The droid craned its neck, trying to keep watch over the child even from the periphery.

"She's his mother." Zem whispered.

The droid's demeanor seemed to change. "Oh, well why didn't you tell me."

Rolling a distance back again towards the door, it clasped its hands together.

"If you should need me, I will be in the other room."

[Teagan s'Ilancy]

She'd been out rummaging, exploring areas of the camp that were usually off-limits. Technically she was supposed to be studying for some sort of history lesson, since the rain had put a stop to most of the outdoor activities. She was supposed to be in her room with datapads turned on and a stylus furiously scribbling notes. But no. That stuff was in no way interesting right now. Her time with the Cizerack woman was still fresh, and Teagan was determined to stay out despite the weather.

She'd been poking through the settlement's outskirts when the shuttle had come down, but figuring it for another supply run, the Lupine had turned away with little interest. She had missed the emergence of her mother, and of Zem going forward to greet her. Instead, she'd trotted off to inspect other rain-soaked interests.

Her explorations had taken her in a sweeping pattern, and as time went on, she'd found herself once more close to the dormitories. Ugh. The vornskr gave a dissatisfied sniff, turning to head away once more, when the sight of Jamis made her pause. He was running. Well, it made sense being that the rain was still coming down, but the way he was running...

It was as if he had some sort of important thing to tell someone about. Her head cocked to the side, then swiveled to look in the direction that the boy had come from. There was no way to pinpoint exactly where he had started, but general areas were better than no areas, and taking this new mystery as a chance to delay her studies further, Teagan moved away from the dormitories once more. She trotted along, keeping to the sides of each building and avoiding the more open areas of the camp. Slowly she made her way to the general vicinity that she'd seen Jamis coming from, and it wasn't long before Zem's tent came into view.

Movement caught her eye, a distance away. Two figures moving away, their strides quick as they hurried to avoid being too entirely soaked. They paused for a moment under an awning, spoke for a short moment, then continued on, making their way towards the infirmary. Again they paused at the door, and the young Lupine stirred from her haunches, rising to stand suddenly as she watched the two step inside.

All efforts at hiding her movements were thrown to the winds, and Teagan loped after the pair.

Skidding to a halt at the door, the gangly vornskr reared up to scrabble a paw at the entry button. The door whisked upwards, and the Lupine darted inside.

She saw Zem first, but not the other one. He was standing next to the nursery droid. The other, the one he'd come inside with...

She let out a huffed breath then, and not even bothering to shake the rainwater from her pelt, Teagan slowly padded forward towards the older Jedi.

[Zem Vymes]

"Oh go away, go away. Shoo, shoo."

The infirmary droid accosted the dripping wet dog with disdain, but in an artificially hushed tone as it had to keep the noise to a minimum. Zem placed a hand on it's shoulder, and looked to Teagan with a raised brow.

"Young lady, you're not coming in here looking like that."

He wasn't talking about the change. He was talking to the dripping mess she was carrying in with her.

"Go dry under the awning, and come right back."

He wasn't about to ask why she was skulking about on a night she ought to be studying. That could come later.

[Teagan s'Ilancy]

Stopping in her tracks, Teagan looked from the droid to Zem, then to the doorway. She wanted so desperately to know who was in there, and if her suspicion was correct...

Tawny eyes remained turned upward at the older man, and presently the vornskr backed away. She didn't want to leave the infirmary, and as the first scents of a familiar person reached her nose, that feeling was only further affirmed. It also made her heart skip a beat. All thoughts of going back outside under the awning to dry were thrown aside, as her body took over. Her entire frame shook, shaking out raindrops as she shook herself as dry as possible. From her nose to the tip of her tail she shook herself out, throwing droplets of water all throughout the infirmary in a small shower. She stood still then, trying to decide if her effort was satisfactory enough, and as another few moments passed, her body shook once more to rid itself of any other bits of water. She was still damp, that was inescapable; but she was no longer a dripping mass of fur.

Hopefully her effort was good enough. It had to be. She knew the scent that now filled her nostrils, and she wouldn't be told 'no' anymore.

The Lupine gave a sneeze, then barreled ahead, past Zem and into the nursery.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

She'd heard Zem's words, then the sneeze, and then the soft padding of paws as they came into the nursery. Pulling her hand away from Markos, s'Il turned to look at the young Lupine who had darted into the room. She smiled at the sight, kneeling down while in the same motion letting the robe fall from her shoulders. Arms went out to take the pup into a hug. One hand still held the robe however, and in a sweeping motion she brought it around the young Lupine.

s'Il burried her face into the damp neckfur, whispering gentle words into the girl's ears.

"Change back, Sweetheart."

And under the protective cover of the robe, s'Il felt her daughter's body shift. It was only a moment later that she felt arms go around her neck, holding her tight. For her part, s'Il brought her daughter up into a strong embrace of her own.

[Zem Vymes]

"Oh my, what a mess. Master Vymes, I must insist that the policy on no pets in the infirmary be enforced."

Zem walked away from the droid, giving it a little wave of his hand as if to defer any conversation it wanted to have for later. He returned to the room in time to see Teagan swaddled in a robe much too big for her, and with Lok swamping her in a bear hug. The Jedi Master didn't say a thing, just leaned against the door frame and smiled. As much as they'd been through, they deserved this moment.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

With a last squeeze, she finally released the girl, holding her back at arm's length for inspection. She appeared healthy - if not a bit wet. In turn, s'Il felt hands going to her face, slender fingers passing over her features.

"I missed you...["

"I missed you too," came the unbidden response. It made her smile, and giving her daughter another quick hug, the elder Lupine pulled back once more. She rocked a little bit on her heels, but remained solidly balanced.

Her eye shifted up to Zem.

"I hope you've been well... ?"

Which was a veiled attempt to divine whether or not her daughter had been behaving.

[Zem Vymes]

"More or less."

Zem grumbled a bit, with a half smile betraying his demeanor as he leaned on the door frame.

"Could use a bit more studying and a bit less playing hooky to go run around."

The youngster's indiscretions were pretty mild, all said. Kids would be kids. Still, playing the hard-ass occasionally helped them recognize where the line was drawn.

[Loklorien s'Ilancy]

For her part, the girl only sent a look over her shoulder and up at the Jedi Master, but it was a fleeting gaze as her eyes very quickly returned to her mother. One hand moved down to idly finger at the uniform sleeve of s'Il's tunic.

"I've been fine."

The elder Lupine smiled at that, understanding the underlying meaning in Zem's words, but she could not help the fact that for now, she was simply happy to have her children with her once more. The time for further review of her daughter's behavior could come later.

Lifting her own hands, s'Il bundled the robe a little bit more around the girl, her smile a gentle one as she reached across to brush away wet bangs from grey-blue eyes.

"I've no doubts that you have," she started.

"Are you eating enough?"

Teagan nodded while shifting her weight so that she leaned into the crook of an arm.

"Yeah. Food's ok."

Her smile deepened, and s'Il let out a slight chuckle.

"Well that's good to hear. And your studies... have you-"

"How long are you gonna stay for this time?"

It was a question that not only interrupted her, but it took her by surprise as well. s'Il blinked, suddenly wondering how best to answer. Her eyes closed, and she sighed, her head bowed.

She heard Teagan give a sniff as the girl pulled away.

"I thought so."