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Thread: Incarceration 101

  1. #1
    Tiber Cyn
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    Closed Thread Incarceration 101

    Journal Entry 1



    Day 6 of Incarceration

    First things first my name is Tiber Cyn and I'm writing in this stupid journal because in prison there isn't much to keep one's mind occupied. If you don't keep your mind occupied in this place you might go a bit stir crazy and end up in ward section 818. Frankly I would rather keep out of the crazy house section of Star's end I here there are some really screwed up people in there.

    Heard once that some dude in there bit off his own finger because he didn't like getting pointed at. Yeah just fathom that some guy notices one of his fingers point in his general direction and instead of just moving it, he bites the dam thing off. So it's just plain better to write in this thing even if feels like I'm talk/writing to myself.

    Honestly though other then not wanting to go crazy I don't know why I'm writing this Journal not like anyone is ever going to read. When I die in this crap hole they might send it to sister Max so I guess she might read it. Actually she probably will knowing her always wanting to know stuff that was best not known by others. That and her natural instinct to want to protect me so she will torture herself with reading this.

    Now if anyone else reads you got to know my sister Max means well and if you have this journal you best be getting it to her. You see Max pretty much raised me even though she is only five years older than me. You see are mother died when I was six do to trying to give birth to, the child died as well. On my eighth birthday my father took his own life. The selfish basterd left two kids to fend for themselves. Still Max at age 12 took over the role of parent and that instinct never left her not even when I signed up for the military.

    Any that's enough for now about my sister for now if I think about her too much I start missing home. Missing home is another bad thing to do in this place. A man who misses home and only longs to return when he never can starts contemplating ways to end it all. Call me a glutton for punishment or too stubborn to take the selfish way out like my father but I would rather suffer this place then end it all.

    Well I guess this is it for my first entry there yelling about cell check then lunch. Yeah time to go get some protein slop that will no doubt taste like stale tooth paste. Not mention having to deal with all the other inmates in the jungle that is cafeteria.
    Last edited by Tiber Cyn; May 28th, 2010 at 12:00:59 PM.

  2. #2
    Tiber Cyn
    Guest
    Journal Entry 2

    Day 8 of Incarceration


    Here I am again writing to nobody in this stupid little book two days after my first entry. Since the intro to who I am is out of the way onto something else I guess. I already talked about my sister a little bit and my father and mother. I would tell you all why I’m prisoner 56793401 but I'm not ready to tell that story just yet since we are just getting to know each other and all.

    Let's start with something simple like where I come from. I was born on the planet of Little Kessel. I find it funny they call it little Kessel when the planet itself has nothing in common with Kessel. About the only thing they got is there close proximity to each other. Anyway I was born on little Kessel not the big one that was mined to death but the one with mushroom fields.

    I grew up dirt poor my mother's father I guess my grandpa had allot of money but he disowned my mom after she married my dad. I never saw a dime or a present from that old greedy pig. Not even after my dad took his life did he even once think about taking me and my sis in.

    My dad inherited his dirt farm from his father when he passed a year or two after Max was born. Nothing ever grew on that spot and on the rare occasion something did sprout it was just enough to feed the family not make a cred or two. I guess after dad used the Blastech on his face me and Max sort of inherited the dirt plot. That was my home till I was 17 never left the planet before then.

    Little Kessel was a descent enough place a few nice folks in the area where me and my sister where. I remember a few times the nearest neighbor checking up on us making sure we had food and wood in the winter. Even got thru my grade 9 education thanks to teacher who lived in a nearby town. Thanks to her I learned to read and write descent enough so I could tell you all this. Miss Hadron was her name she later became Mrs. Killinger then she disappeared shortly after that and my education stopped there.

    So now you know a bit more about me.
    Last edited by Tiber Cyn; May 28th, 2010 at 12:05:59 PM.

  3. #3
    Tiber Cyn
    Guest
    Journal Entry 3

    Day 9 of Incarceration


    Writing to you this soon you should feel blessed or curse probably the later. It's not like I am forcing you to read this you do it for your pleasure or self abuse I guess. Any why am I writing so soon cause I got into an altercation with another prisoner today. He thought it would be funny to push me around and call me a child and woman killer. I kicked him square in the pills then broke his jaw with one sold shot as he doubled over.

    Now the guards which are mostly droids with their only objective to kill you if you attempt to pass a certain line didn't care. The few human guards running about just laughed they really don't care, there here to collect a paycheck. So now this guy I kicked in the pills went crying to his buddies and now I'm on some no name gang’s hit list. Just saying this journal could be in someone else hands sooner than expected.

    Yet to the guys point for picking the fight did I kill women and children. I did kill a woman and three children as well as the father in that family picture. It haunts me every day and I don't make any excuses I was the one that pulled the trigger. I could have said no I could have disobeyed a direct order but I didn't. I did my job like any good soldier would have. Now my commitment to duty and respect for authority has landed me here because I did what I was told.

    I'm not cold blooded the images of that family hang there in my thoughts and I can't get rid of them. I don't want that to ever go away cause once it does I know I will have lost everything. I don't like to kill I did it for the empire that I thought was right and just. I lost faith in them the moment they ordered me to kill that family. It fully went away when they need someone to blame for killing the wrong family.

    I'm choking up thinking about them I need stop and take a breath talk to whomever is reading this soon if I'm not dead yet.
    Last edited by Tiber Cyn; May 28th, 2010 at 12:11:56 PM.

  4. #4
    Tiber Cyn
    Guest
    Journal Entry 4

    Day 11 of Incarceration

    I'm kind of hiding out in the laundry area for my section right now. Asking to pull triple shifts because if I go back to my bunk that gang hunting me, will get me. The guards don't care if we work are selves to death but we do get periodic breaks which I'm writing in this thing on. The gang won't get me in the laundry room because it's one of their rivals claimed territories.

    Yet I don't want to talk about my current state of paranoia but rather I want talk a little more about my past. I said I left little Kessel when I was 17 for the first time. This true on my 17th birthday I signed up with the imperials to be a storm trooper. One of the faceless few that do pretty much all of the fighting for the empire with little or no recognition.

    I was shipped off to basic for six months of training and then put out in the field as soon as I got out. It's funny they pretty much teach you two things in basic how to fire a gun and fire it well and how to die properly by taking as many people with you as you can. When you’re in basic for the storm troopers there is no sense you are going to live no you are going to die for the empire. You are going to die for a cause you believe so others can lead better more productive lives.

    Yet everyone who goes in knows this almost immediately and guess what because of this no one fears death. The empire breeds perfect soldiers ones willing to die in fact expecting to die on the battle field. Ones that will do anything crazy or not just to win.

    So yes I went in knowing I was going to die but expecting to make the worlds a better and safer place for my sister. I mean I was a waste as it was a poor farmer’s son with a grade 9 education. The best I could was sacrifice myself for others so that may have the life I wished I could.

    Funny part about this is I manage to be one of the few I guess unlucky troopers I survived and I seemed to do it well. I mean I was in some real bad places and some real tuff scrapes that I will talk about those later. I guess there was a divine plan to land my arse here for some reason. Maybe I'm just a cosmic joke.

    Who knows I'm getting screamed at to go back to work?

  5. #5
    Tiber Cyn
    Guest
    Journal Entry 5

    Day 13 of Incarceration

    Nearing two weeks since I was put in these walls for the atrocities these hands caused. To think now they pen my thoughts just as easily as they pulled the trigger and shot so many others. With hands you can create and destroy they are what build worlds and burn them to the ground in a thought.

    Hands are why I write to you today, I found myself in a predicament with the gang that wants me dead. It seems they paid the other gang I was using as a shield to cross into their turf. The laundry room was not the safest place as two men approached and attempted to attack me.

    I told you storm troopers where trained to die to make you a better future but they are also trained to fight. It is inevitable that they are going to die at some point but they give you the tools to fight for your survival. The imperials don't just throw you into and say good luck no they give you the tools you need. However these tools can only get you so far and only those who can adapt and find new uses for those tools will survive. Which is very few and those that do will eventually make a mistake.

    Enough about dyeing in battle where I am at is a different kind of war. This one where they don't want to kill you they want to show you they have power over you. This is the kind of war where you will survive but they will strip you of your dignity. They will show others just how weak and pathetic you can be.

    A war of prison you don't want to lose because you don't die. You have to listen to everyone’s words and ridicules. Where as in the other war if you lose you die and you don't have here the words of shame. No it's worse to lose a war and live then it is to lose and die.

    But there two goons found out just how well a storm troopers are really trained. As they lay there in the infirmary I hope they can survive without their dignity. I wonder how many more of their kind will hunt me just to try and strip me off my own dignity.

  6. #6
    Tiber Cyn
    Guest
    Entry 6

    They say if you search a man’s soul you will find deceit, hate, and a thirst for blood. Ever man, woman, and child has the capacity to lie, despise, and kill another. Lies are the easiest for everyone they just slip off the lips without a thought. Often times something as innocent of not wanting to hurt someone's feelings.

    To hate another there has to be a reason most of the time it's the accumulation of lies and false promises. Hate it almost as simple as the lies it's almost an instinctual way to protect one's self from those who have harmed you. You hate your neighbor because he doesn't stop his dog from crapping on your front step. You hate your kids because they give you no respect. You hate the chick at the bar because she came up with some lame lie to turn down your advances.

    Even the Jedi of old who said they purged most emotion especially hate where lying to themselves and everyone else. It's Naive to think that the thousands of years they were around before the empire put them on the extinction list that they never despised another group or person. Even if that person or group were the vilest pieces of crap in the galaxy hate was still in the heart of the Jedi for that person or group. No one is perfect and the Jedi set themselves up to fail trying to make people believe they were perfect.

    Now I don't have anything against the Jedi, I'm far from agreeing with everything the empire does and has done. All I'm saying is with their structure and this ideal they tried to live it was bound to fail. No man or woman is perfect and it is impossible to live a perfect life. Anyone who tries will ultimately fail and that's what happened to the Jedi. They let their ideals take hold of them but the lies caught up with them and group of people began to despise and hate them for it. Their pride was there ultimate down fall not the empire. There lies and false promises catching up to them brought about hate against them.

    That is the same reason the republic failed it lied and made unfulfilled promises. It was both the Jedi and republics pride and Ego that destroyed them not the empire. They turned some of their own people against them if you don't see that or believe that then you are Naive. Look at the people who support or did support the empire that alone shows you there was hate against the both the republic and the Jedi. Those loyalists would have joined any group that had opposed those to force it just so happened to be the empire that became that single group.

    Now those who were loyalist to the republic and the Jedi now stand with those that hate the empire for its atrocities. The reemerging Jedi stand beside those same men supporting that hate. I'm not saying that makes them wrong by any means to me and what I have learned and read in my time of incarceration is that there is no right way. I mean I hate the empire for what I was told to do but I made the choice to follow that order and with it I suffer the consequences. There is no right and there is no such thing as perfection.

    The Empire is not right but neither are the Rebel's and there Jedi allies. Any Rebel that would condemn me for my actions I would say to them how many have you killed for what you thought was right? How many of those you killed where just men collecting a pay check and had no real malice towards those they were fighting? Most of the soldiers in the Imperial army are like me do what you’re told and have dreams of settling down when all this shit is over with someone we love no matter what side wins. It may be delusional dream but it's what holds allot of men together hope of surviving and then leaving all behind when it's over.

    I was shaking when I put my rifle to the back of the head of each of the children of the family I was ordered to kill. I wasn't some Imperial loyalist I was soldier my job was to fight wars. People die in war, I collect a paycheck and when my tour is over I go home find that woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. Forget about all that shit that happened as if it where another life at least that's what I thought.

    Those people on the other side they were just like me with those same dreams more than likely. In the end either there dream died or mine did. I wasn't fighting for the empire in my mind I was fighting for my own future. Had I disobeyed the order I was given my future would have ended in act of treason. In following it my dream ended as well I was in no win situation in the end. Any man can be brought to kill another even if it's a child at the other end of the rifle. It's a survival instinct I thought if I did what I was told I would be one step closer to being a survivor. In my case it would have been just more after that not a family because that is all I am good at fighting and surviving but for others there is that dream they are not all vile men at the other end of the gun. Yet when pushed with me or him everyone will choose themselves and kill the other.

    All I'm saying to these ceil walls is that the empire is no better than the rebels or the other way around. Every man alien or not has deceit, hate, and is capable of killing, it's write in their souls. No man out there is any better than me and I'm not any better than them. There is no such thing as perfect, both sides are killing, lying, and hating against each other. I did what I did to survive it doesn't make it right but most would make the same choice I did.

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