U kalle rah doe kankee kung!

[Blarga the Hutt]

{transl. from Huttese: "You're my kind of scum!"}
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Having a Hutt on board a pleasure cruiser was not good for business. They might own more credits than half the galaxy combined, but none of it could be sufficient to make up for that great bloated mass of Hutt-body, the rancid smell and the eternally foul temper. Fortunately, the ridiculous wealth the members of that species usually had amassed meant that the rest of the galaxy didn't need to meet them anywhere but in those places where the various Hutts had made their home, and even those could be easily avoided. Most Hutts had the decency to not inflict themselves on the public by virtue of travelling in their own starships.

But today wasn't any of those times, and this apparently wasn't most Hutts either, because when the ship's Accommodation's manager dared to open his eyes again, the accursed sight was still right in front of him. Not a mirage, then - a thought he had fervently prayed for when he'd squeezed his eyes shut a moment earlier.

The Hutt came with an entourage of two Rodians. It was a small Hutt - if one could call it that - he was certainly slimmer than some Hutts, and had an odd coloration.

And apparently, could not speak Basic.

"H'chu apenkee, o'grandio lust. Twoos pa reeta bah flootah."

Fortunately, Huttese was such a common language these days. So the manager was comfortable enough to reply in Huttese.

"Gutan anolia, o'grandio lorda. Umo ji ati hopa chu?"
"Kuna kee wabdah noleeya - kava nopees do bampa woola?"
"Chuba oto ta Huttuk koga? Za kopa chong waronga."
"Chong waronga?"
"10,000 credits, nopa chong waronga hutta!"
"Skak! Ches ko ba tuta creesta crenko ya kolska!"

This little gem of dialogue was strange enough. First a Hutt wandering off the skylanes onto a ship not his own, accompanied by no more but two of his retainers - and now this? He hadn't even wanted to haggle over the price! And anyway, what was all that about having looked forward to this for a long time?

The poor manager didn't understand it, and merely wordlessly handed the Hutt his cabin keys, some advertisement datachips, and then turned to the next one in line.

[Blarga the Hutt]

Blarga the Hutt slid along the wide corridor in somewhat undulating slurping movements towards his assigned quarter. He was extremely pleased with himself and his mouth was scrunched up in something of a lecherous grin - as much as that could be called a grin, since Hutt physionomy didn't really allow for such fine detail.

The two Rodians behind him were following at an easy distance.

The only concern Blarga still had at this point in his glorious venture, was what to do with those two: he was hoping the quarter he'd been given would be big enough to accommodate his "staff", but until he got there and could see for himself, the worry would exist. What would he do if there wasn't any room? Under no circumstances could he still tell them to stay with him then, because he was sure that would be a dead giveaway, but he could also not afford to pay for extra quarters. He hadn't dared ask for the price of additional cabins for them, because that might have been the wrong question if his own quarters already had room for them.

A great big sigh heaved through him and erupted from his mouth in a hollow bubbly belching noise. For a moment his eyes misted up, thinking of all the things he was missing out on, all the things he had never had a chance to know, but then they had finally arrived at his quarters.

One of the Rodians scuttled forward and slipped the keycard through the reader - the door slid aside with a low whooshing sound and revealed the most luxurious suite of rooms within that Blurga had ever seen in his entire life. It was big enough to house a big Hutt and his entire household, at least! His worries were over.

- - - - - - - - - - -

After a lovely nap and some refreshments - provided as a welcoming gift with compliments of the chef - Blarga was beginning to feel utter bliss and contentment. This was the life he had craved for so long, and it was only just the beginning!

He reverently waited for his Rodian hirelings to finish their own snacks, then politely asked them to accompany him down to the casino deck where he was very curious to find out what kind of games and enjoyments lay in store for him. The Rodians looked at him a little oddly - had he offended them in some way? did they need to nap some more? - but agreed to come after a brief whispered conversation in their own language which Blarga hoped to at least understand one day, too, if not speak.

For Blarga the Hutt had an extraordinary talent for learning languages and could understand at least 15 different ones so far, but had a strange handicap when trying to speak in them, since his tongue seemed unable to pronounce anything other than Huttese. It had been one of his greatest wishes to be able to one day afford the extremely expensive operation which would give him a special implant which would make his handicap disappear, but when the time had come he'd not had the heart to go through with it and decided to fulfill his even greater wish - to experience at least for a short time the life and joys of a big Hutt.

[Rylard 'Lardo' Tenf]

Lardo was busy raking in the credits at a sabacc table near a viewport situated on the staboard side of the casino deck. The view was a nice one, catching the northern hemesphere of the planet the liner was in orbit of. If the Iridonian wasn't busy with the card game he'd have taken a gander, then again it wasn't in his character to do so. He gazed at stars and planets for a living being the pilot of the Voodoo Heart. This was his free time, game time.

The fat, red and black tattooed, Zabrak tapped the ash from his cigar with his stubby fingers before placing it back between his lips and showing his cards. Another win. It was almost time to play the losing game, but with the chumps at his table being cleaned out he needed to find a high roller or two.

[Blarga the Hutt]

The casino deck was full of new and exciting experiences for Blarga. He had never seen such a large congregation of all the different species of the Galaxy - and they were all dressed in such wonderful ways! Here and there diamonds - fake or real - sparkled, shimmersilk robes glittered in the light, skimpy dresses met frayed leather pants, hairstyles clashed with skintones of all colors and shapes. There were creatures Blarga couldn't even name, and sooooo many different languages! It was utterly fascinating!

The Rodians behind him were chittering in their own language again, sounding a little angry. Yes - he must go and mingle! and not stop in the doorway.

--------

Blarga was a Hutt oddity. For most of his younger life he had been a little underling toiling away in a little room of his clan's home, laughed and sneered at for his diminutive size and his lack of understanding of the principle values of Hutt culture. It had not helped his self-confidence an awful lot. In a desperate attempt to fit in he had made a grave error of judgement one day while overseeing a minor project of a minor clansmember, and presented the clan with an ideal excuse: he'd been cast out and told to find a way to survive - no doubt his clan never expected him to do so. But away from the prying eyes and criticism of his clan, he'd discovered he had a few useful skills - such as a keen eye for fashion and modern art. He'd settled down on Kuat and and become chief advisor of one of the Kuati high families - a job that involved knowing a lot about logistics and procurement as well as fashion and art, and he'd had fun for a few years. But the Emperor's death had somehow caused his family's financial ruin, so he'd grabbed what he could, transfered a nice chunk of credits into his own account and ran.

For a year he'd been too scared to move out of the miserable hole he'd rented for himself under a fake identity, but it seemed no one had even missed him on Kuat, nor had his theft been noticed. So he'd decided to use the credits and see about fulfilling some of his life-long dreams.

Being aboard a pleasure liner and leading the life of a proper Hutt was the third such fulfillment. The first had been the purchase of a large apartment on Coruscant. The second had been the purchase of a slavegirl. And now, the third, had seen him hiring two Rodians as his personal entourage and booking the best Hutt suite on board this liner. He'd allowed himself a little money for actual gambling, but after that he would need to look for a new employer because soon the upkeep of his house and slave would have eaten away the rest of his small fortune that was already substantially slimmed down.

--------

Undulating his - even for a small Hutt substantially massive - body over the polished floor, he moved over to the sabacc table, intent on finding out what this game was like. He'd learned all the rules and theoretical knowledge of it, but had had no practical experience of it.

Beings of all species dodged out of the way at his approach, even though he smiled at them quite benevolently. A great muttering had started to move through the crowds at his entrances - no doubt they were all awed at having a Hutt on board!

[Kraleil 'Alekeg' Schous]

The Defel appeared seemingly out of nowhere to jank at his left elbow and grunt into his ear.

"Aye fatso, foun' sumonnn ferya, Hutt!"

Alekeg looked over his shoulder at the approaching blob of slime, then back at Lardo.

"Will 'at do ferya?"

[Rylard 'Lardo' Tenf]

The newcomer slid up to the table, shoving a seat aside to accommodate his large self. Lardo grinned, his cigar brightening as he inhaled. Alekeg could pick a good mark, just like he could a drink.

"I'd say so." Rylard passed the Defel some of his previous winnings, "Enjoy yourself mate."

[Blarga the Hutt]

Blarga had finally managed to traverse the expansive casino main floor to where the Sabbacc tables were, and - finding only one of them active at the late hour, he slid up to it and looked around.

Now that he was where he hd wanted to go, he was at a loss for what to say. What did one say to introduce oneself?

Fortunately his Rodian retainers took care of this: one had grabbed something that looked like some sort of a reclining couch, and the other cleared away the space on one table side, announcing to everyone around that this was the great Blurga the Hutt, come to add to his big wealth.

Gratefully, Blarga rested his body on the couch. Nervously, he finally rumbled a greeting to the rest of the people around the table, all fine specimen of whatever race they were.

"Tugi! Chaz ke ji da chuzu ka!"

[Kraleil 'Alekeg' Schous]

"Whazzz 'e sayn?"

Alekeg had watched the Hutt move in on their table but his blurry eyesight was failing him now completely. Anyway, the thing... the blob.... oh, the Hutt was making no sense to him. What sort of a language was that anyway, he was sure he'd heard it but it was all Huttese to him.

Alekeg squinted up at Lardo for some hint, then belatedly at the credit chips now lying in front of him. He hiccuped.

"Ayeeeee.... -hyuuuuuuuuuuuuurppp- thanksh! Yoooor a reeel frien..."

[Rylard 'Lardo' Tenf]

Rylard whispered to the Defel, "He says hi, and he's feeling lucky."

The Zabrak nodded to the Hutt and greeted him in return. Rylard had learned a few phrases in Huttese a while ago during one of his self-education stints over long flights. He tried his best, hoping not to butcher the language.

"Huta ya nolia. Ma pika na Lardo."

He then placed a few chips on the table, two one-thousand credit pieces, and a starship. Lardo leaned back afterwards hoping the Hutt would place his wager down if he didn't chicken out.

[Blarga the Hutt]

Blarga felt such excitement at the thought that he was going to be in his first real Sabbacc game, that he didn't even notice that someone was trying to get his attention - one of the ship's staff-members had sidled up to him, followed by a protocol droid, who kept asking him in Huttese what he would want to drink. One of his Rodians finally had the guts to pat him on his short stubby arm, and remind him he was supposed to order a drink.

"Banya kee fofo Aduki, momo."

At the same time one of the creatures at the table was talking to him, so having dealt with drinks order he turned back just in time to hear a large human with an odd assortment of spiky protrusions on his head answer his greeting in Huttese. How fortunate! The man's name was Lardo, he had said.

"Me Blarga."

Noticing that the droid had stayed behind, he gestured to it and asked it if it would be kind enough to stay as translator for him and these illustrious people. It agreed.

Turning back, Blarga saw his new friend had put down two thousand credit and a starship, and his excitement grew. He gestured for his Rodians to put down his own wager - 5 thousand credits. He hoped it would be enough.

[Rylard 'Lardo' Tenf]

Lardo nodded to the Hutt in agreement and the cards were delt.

Blarga's bet came up short just a bit, but winning this pot wasn't the goal for Lardo, so it didn't matter. The Hutt took the bait, now it was time for a bit of bad luck.

If the cards came out right nothing would have to be done. Rylard could just sit and play it out like a regular game. However if things came up in the Zabrak's favour a bit of tweaking needed to happen.

[Blarga the Hutt]

After everyone had placed their bets into the two pots - Lardo's ship remaining the only non-credit chip in either pot - the droid dealer began doling out two cards to each of the participants around the table. There were 5 of them, Lardo, his drunken friend and Blarga included.

Blarga picked up his cards, and fanned them out in his chubby hands. A Nine of Staves, and the Queen of Air and Darkness - value positive seven. Didn't look like anything promising, but then this was Sabacc, he could still exchange cards or hope that the shift would give him something decent.

Noticing that the others around the table were similarly occupied, he called to the dealer for another card.

[Kraleil 'Alekeg' Schous]

Alekeg's hands trembled violently as he picked up his own cards and held them up to his face so he could squint at them. A master of flasks and the moderation card. Disgusted, he threw them back down onto the table but the Moderation card flipped around to come lying face up, staring him into the face. Even his blurry eyesight wouldn't block it out. The cards were threatening him now!

He groaned, and and threw his arm up in front of his face so he could hide from the evil card.

Then he slid off the chair and stumbled into Lardo, and held onto him for dear life, drunkenly babbling "Duh-duh---duh cardshh aw evllllll....!"

[Rylard 'Lardo' Tenf]

Lardo set his cards face down a moment and stood up, righting the drunkard as he did so. He narrowed his eyes on the defel and placed a hand on his shoulder. He shook a finger at the alien while he spoke.

"Ruin this suit and I will take you down a peg or two. I don't need to lose a nice suit and a 'lux ship because of your superstitions."

The Zabrak smoothed out the fabric of his sleeves and sat down picking his cards up again. They showed the Ace of Coins and The Star, negative two in total. Lardo, like the Hutt, called for another card.

[Kraleil 'Alekeg' Schous]

Alekeg sniffed and slumped back ontop of the chair. With an off-kilter sort of stare he eyed up his comrade and the Moderation card at the same time, and whined "Buh-buh-buh am tell'n yooou, th' cardshh aw ebul!" Then he noticed Lardo asking for another card, and decided this was his only way out.

He picked it up in one corner, taking care not to touch too much of it, and threw it back at the droid dealer.

"Gimme othrrrr cardshhh!"

[Blarga the Hutt]

Blarga, after having received his third card from the droid dealer, swept a quick look around the table and watched the drunkard's antics with much amusement. Truly, these creatures were such an inspired lot!

The new card was a Commander of Coins, which brought the value of his hand up to positive 19. Which at least was below 23, so his chances weren't completely frelled. And there would be a card switch, too, at some point.

With a rumbling chuckle, he gestured to his Rodian - who threw another credit chip into the pot, upping it by 2,000 creds.

[Rylard 'Lardo' Tenf]

The Idiot. Lardo's hand remained at negative two.

When Blarga raised he guessed the Hutt had a fairly good hand. He called the bet and threw in another two-thousand credits to meet Blarga's wager.

Comfortable with his losing hand Lardo called for his final card. The Three of Coins for a total of positive one. He placed The Star and the Idiot in the neutral field. Hopefully the Hutt would get a hand that won the pot, while the others at the table were about to have a run of bad luck.

[Kraleil 'Alekeg' Schous]

When Alekeg got his new card in return for the Moderation card, he howled, and threw it down on the ground. It was the commander of flasks.

Sniffing and snorting, he shambled away and off to their shuttle that was currently occupying the forward landing bay of the cruiser.

[Blarga the Hutt]

Blarga ho- and-hummed to himself as he considered his cards. He'd exchanged his nine of Staves for a Two of Sabers which brought his total down to positive 14. It wasn't really anything special, and the two cards Lardo had placed in the stasis field were making him itchy in some annoying way.

He wondered what the horned humnaoid was doing, but couldn't find an explanation for it. Another two-thousand wandered into the growing pot.

After the fourth round they'd be able to call. He was still one card deal away from that. But instead of yet another change he decided to pass on this one, holding on to his cards and hoping for something to happen.

He got his wish because just after they had all completed their fourth round and places their bets, the shift happened. And suddenly he was holding an Ace of Staves, a Four of Coins and a Four of Staves. Which made it positive 23. Pure Sabacc. He called the hand.

[Rylard 'Lardo' Tenf]

The Ace and Three of Coins had been shifted to Endurance and Two of Sabres. Combined with the cards in the neutral field Lardo held a hand of -23. Sabacc.

He grinned as he called the Hutt.

"Negative twenty-three. Looks like I'll be keeping my ship and takin' this money unless you've got the right cards."